I swear I had one glass of wine and that’s it

Last night I had a dream that Kristen and I were at some kind of airport. There was a very long set of very wide stairs, and there was a line of hundreds of people leading down the stairs. I was carrying some kind of baseball bat and I don’t know why or where it came from. The line moved really quickly and before I knew it, we were standing in front of a returns desk with an ornery guy behind the desk. For some reason I was trying to return the baseball bat, which, when I looked down at it, appeared very used and clearly in no kind of returnable condition. The man balked at the request to accept the return. I insisted, growing purposefully more and more impatient in some kind of end game to just completely piss him off. That happened, and ultimately he wouldn’t take the bat back. I was so faux-pissed off at him that we walked away from the desk, and then after a few steps I went right back up to the desk and picked up a small bonsai tree in a planter that was sitting on the desk and dumped it over in front of the guy. People still in line gave me some kind of ambiguous reaction, and we ascended the stairs at a deliberate pace, believing we were about to be pursued by someone like security or police. The next thing I remember, we are boarding a plane and I’m standing next to Kris Dobbins in front of a very large red toolbox with wide drawers, like an industrial Craftsman toolchest. I opened the very bottom drawer and it was full of an opaque, flesh-colored liquid. Kris explained that this was the way people travel now and that they are somehow converted to liquid for the flight and then, I presume, somehow resurrected after the trip is over. I kept staring at the contents of the drawer, sloshing back and forth, trying to come to terms with how this was the way it had to be for everybody, and I struggled mightily with the concept of how they could turn everyone into this liquid and co-mingle them in a drawer, and then somehow it all got sorted out once the trip was over. I wracked my brain trying to figure out how someone would figure out what part of the liquid belonged to who, and how it could all go back together properly. I was really, really concerned and Kris seemed very accepting of the status quo and continued to reassure me that this was just the way it is now.

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